Sticky Intro Post~

Hi Everyone! I'm Akira, female, still in high school~

I'm really into writing, mostly fiction, though I do dabble in fanfiction and poetry! I have been working on a self-instigated novella, if you'd like to know more about that, find the tag for it in the sidebar and give me feedback because that would be the bomb :p

I play the flute and am pretty passionate about that; I hope to major in music someday and play in a big orchestra for money 8D I like to think I'm pretty upbeat, though like every other teenage out there, I do have my rant moments :p I'm really into k-pop and k-dramas, though I do listen to some j-pop and sometimes, give the occasional mainstream western song a try, as long as it's got a good beat :p ALSO, I listen to some rock music, including Skillet, Linkin Park, Three Days Grace, All Time Low and now starting into bands like Parachute and Imagine Dragons! OH and let's not forget Sleeping with Sirens, my new obsession <3 Kellin Quinn really is a gem, guys :3

I also adore orchestral music, which makes sense because I was a part of the country's best band, but I love listening to any band music, any classical music by any composer at all XD I am biased towards piano, flute, clarinet, oboe and French Horn though! I've always wanted to play French Horn TT___TT Tis the woes of being a good little flute player :p

Ultimate Kpop biases include: Jung Yonghwa and Lee Minhyuk from CNBlue, Sandeul, Gongchan, and Baro from B1A4, Niel from TEENTOP, Jung Yunho from TVXQ/DBSK, and Lee Sungmin from Super Junior! If you look through my userpics, they're all of them :p

 Most of my LJ is about my life, because I think documenting how you are can be pretty hilarious when you're older and you look back, and I do post some writing I feel a little less self-conscious about, and the occasional kpop spaz post :p

Other things I'm into are debating, disney, fairytales, public speaking, fashion, and photography! Most of my posts can be a little...spaz heavy about whichever specimen of the male species I'm interested in at the moment, but right now, there is no one, so we're all good~ :p

If we have anything in common, let's be friends!~ Also, do check out my profile if you'd like to know more~~

Au revoir!


2014 Scrapbook l2013 Scrapbook | 2012 Scrapbook

Stick Intro Post!~

Hi everyone!

I'm Andrea, (most of this LJ was written under the name Akira because I really liked how it sounded and wanted to use it as my "internet name" hehe), and I'm a uni student! Feels so weird saying it, seeing as I just graduated high school, but I'm pretty fortunate to be studying what I love :D I'm in McMaster University's Arts and Science Program, minoring in Music and Biochem!(derp my last intro post said that I'd love to major in Music someday, but I ended up not wanting to let my other passions go XD)

Most of my LJ is about my life, because I honestly feel like it's passing by faster and faster these days D: It's definitely pretty darn hilarious to look back on all my derp moments/rants about boys when I've "grown up and matured" XDD I've been on LJ since 2011, though I've been so sososo bad about updating it since about 2013. Now that I'm starting Uni in a couple months, I figured I might as well rekindle the little spark I had for blogging! Woohoo!

I love listening to pretty much all music, but I'm really into Kpop, though I give the usual Jrock/Jpop song a try! I also really love Orchestral/Concert Band/Classical music, which has pretty much been bred into me, as a flutist for about 7 years now XD For all my Kpop fans, ultimate Kpop biases include: Jung Yonghwa and Lee Minhyuk from CNBlue, Niel from TEENTOP, Jung Yunho from TVXQ/DBSK, and Lee Sungmin from Super Junior! If you look through my userpics, they're all of them :p

ther things I'm into are debating, disney, fairytales, public speaking, fashion, and photography! Most of my posts can be a little...spaz heavy about whichever specimen of the male species I'm interested in at the moment, but right now, there is no one, so we're all good~ :p

If we have anything in common, let's be friends!~ Also, do check out my profile if you'd like to know more~~

Au revoir!

(obligatory awkward selfie :p)

2014 Scrapbook l2013 Scrapbook | 2012 Scrapbook

helloooo hamilton~

OKAY, I'm here LJ friends! I can tell you that I didn't feel a THING when I was boarding the plane, even when I landed, but when I got here and found something Chelsea gave me, it just hit me how much I would miss home X__X. The drive from the airport to the apartment was SO freaking PRETTY because it was all trees and fields and flowers and stuff, not like the drive to the Winnipeg airport XD One of my friends Josellee and her dad dropped my famjam at the airport and she gave me this heartfelt letter there that kind of cleared up some things that were between us, which I'm super thankful for xD Ever find that you lose faith in people sometimes, but then all of a sudden, something happens that makes you regain faith in them? Yeah, I find it hard to categorize people these days because they just keep changing and I don't have a specific niche for them like I used to :p

I don't think this post will be that detailed, but long story short, our apartment building is like 12 floors high, looks horribly old from the outside, though the balconies look like cookie sheets, BUT inside, it looks quite nice, though we're still missing curtains and fans and stuff. We already have things like desks (mine has the world map embossed on it! hehe)m a dining table, three coffee tables, a shelf for the router and stuff, lamps, beds and shelves, but the living room is still pretty empty. The apartment itself is bigger, but the bedrooms and the bathroom are smaller than our old one, if that makes sense. We don't have a carpet, but we do have a hardwood floor, and the windows slide open, instead of having someone sort of roll them open like my old apartment. Last night, i didn't even get to take the plastic off my mattress, and I didn't have a pillow yet, so I just kind of slept on it with my blanket, which was a little uncomfortable, because the mattress itself was harder than my old one xD I miss my bunk bed dearly already, I did enjoy sleeping on the top bunk a lot {C}{C}

We were supposed to go meet more people today at church, but we overslept and woke up and hour early, and for the 4 of us, that really isn't enough, so we ended up staying while my dad went ahead and went to church. We still need to go shopping for basics like shampoo, though we did bring toothpaste, toothbrushes, and my dear beloved hair straightener and heat protectant :p

I still don't know WHAT to think of this place, because for anyone who's been, it's a lot like downtown Winnipeg, but less...dirty and hobofilled :p The houses are really old, some with runners and weeds growing up the sides, I even saw a fire hydrant with flowers growing out of the top part, though I don't know if someone intentionally did that :p The stores and such are very old and very quaint, which is kind of strange, and I'm getting a little bored because there really aren't a lot of people nearby. My dad said that when the university students come to McMaster University, the place will be more buzzing, but that's not until 2 full months!! Ugh, I'd much rather meet silly asian people than no people at all XD

Tooodles everyone!~~

kang minhyuk~~



Someone tell me how to get over someone you've been amplifying in your head? After only a handful of encounters with Boy 1 over an extended period of time, I've been filling in the gaps of his personality like a fairytale author, and now, I feel miserable :( He's good looking, and smart, and somewhere under his introvertedness, he has a sweet side, but I've gone and saddled myself with a huuuge crush, and honestly, it didn't even feel like one at allllll.

And now I feel awful because I've figured it out, but I still can't stop feeling so..... I dunno, fixated on him!
grrrr someone help me

Lots of love,

creamsicle gum


I have met new friends and have finally spoken to Boy 1 from last post. Let's just say he's a LOT better looking up close, you can drown in his eyes when you stare at them, and his smile crinkles his face in allll the right places. I was really intimidated by him before, I think it was because he's so extremely *smart* in that technical aspect, and I was afraid he'd see me as ditzy and overly happy all the time :p Needless to say, I did approach him with an Unblock Me puzzle, and asked him to solve it, and spent >30 min just having casual conversation and watching him solve that puzzle XD
(what he couldn't solve in >235 moves, I solved in 51. And here I was thinking that I wasn't that smart XD)

IN ANY CASE, I DID make a new friend out of this guy who's new at school, who's named Alex. He's kind of not at all what he seems, but then when you find out that second layer, he's not at all what that makes him seem either. We've had some late Facebook chats, and his taste in music is SO different from mine (except he listens to Beethoven! A+ for him!), and he never fails to remind me on how socially awkward I am and how boring my life is, I think we're starting to become friends, which is good xD He plays the flute, just like me! But he has a girlfriend, so obviously, he's out of the picture here. Though he is quite perceptive, and his life has been hard, he's kind of like a book you want to crack open and read from cover to cover.


ALSO, I'm starting to get into more *ROCK MUSIC*, like All Time Low, Skillet, and starting into some Green Day. Branching off Kpop is a bit of a refreshing change, actually! XD Does anyone have some good bands to recommend?

Looove you allllll <33

PS: MSSS over the weekend! KIND OF SCARED X___X This will be my last one!!

heart to heart

Hey guys!

So it's almost my bedtime curfew, but I really wanted to share this video with you all and just talk about it a little bit before I go to sleep!

Bubz, aka, Lindy Tsang is one of my absolute faaavorite youtubers, just because other than her makeup videos and all, she uploads these Girl Talks that sometimes overfloooowww with wisdom XD I guess this one's my absolute fave so far, just because she talks about a lot of things that people my age would be facing, or already have faced.

Jealousy. Who else has totally looked at someone else and felt really bad about their own personal self, and then proceeded to start this vicious cycle of comparing your achievements, and putting yourself down?

I know I have, especially from a younger age like say, 11 or 12. I remember once, I had this friend who moved away, and she was like my sister, we were so close, and she was just so wise beyond her years and I would go to her every single time I needed help on anything. She moved away, but when we were 12, I just felt so so jealous of her sometimes, her achievements, how she won the first debate medal for our school even though I felt that I was so so much more passionate about debating  and deserved that medal so much more. I felt really really down that night of my very first debate, and I drove home comparing the quality of our voices, our speaking styles, every little thing. It was the same with school, she was so incredibly good at math, she got to do a Pascal contest and made National Honor Roll for that when we were just 12, and dammit, I knew I wasn't at that level in math just yet, but I felt really bad, at the point where I would feel happy
when she messed up on a test and I scored maybe one point higher than her.

I fought it. Of course I fought it. I made a list for myself about  why I should not be jealous of whoever won after a debate tournament, I still have it, of course. Talking about how I'm always a winner, and how trying hard automatically made you a winner. I wrote a letter to my friend, telling her every single thing I felt, about how I'd made T-charts for every single subject we took and list her strengths on one side, and mine on the other. I told her that on the way to an author convention thing when we were 12, still, and she just read my letter to her in the bus beside me, and told me that no, she wasn't perfect. Her parents were divorced, she was dealing with a lot at homeand that I was just as great as she was, that there was nothing to be jealous of.

I felt small, I felt really really small admitting it to her, but then, after we had that talk, I just felt so much better. She had problems, I had problems. She had gifts, maybe I had them too. It wasn't an epiphany, but it was close. It was my first step, nonetheless. In math club, 7th grade, I would still feel sad when she got all those tough logic problems and I didn't. I would still feel bad about myself, but the moments in which I ground down and took control - those were the victories for me.

One quote that I remember hearing that really jumped out at me when it came to jealousy was this one: "Congratulate them, even if you don't mean it. It's not lying, you're being honest, and truthful to yourself. Let's stop being so self-obsessed and be happy for other people too"

When I read that, I just thought that when we all die, and meet God, he won't look at whether or not you had a 40 on the CNML. He won't look at your grades and send you to Heaven based on those. He'll look at the purity of your heart and see only if the love inside it outweighs the hatred. That's it, that's all. Even if you're going two steps forward, one step back, you're still going forward, right?

Later on, I learned a lot about the difference of us as humans, in general. I found myself envying certain people and not others  when I was 12/13, and I asked myself, "Why her and not her?" and my mind said "Because she's in a whole different league from you, but she's not." and then over the early segment of my 13th year, I realized that there really are no levels when it comes to individual people. There are no "leagues", or anything like that. People are like different colours, and I recognized that say, I was a blue, and I couldn't compete with an orange, but I could still compare myself with a green, but then over time, I wondered...why?

Why not just be blue, and not care about the greens, or the yellows, or the oranges? As long as I'm meeting my own goals for myself, reaching the 90s for all my subjects and doing even better in the things I truly care about, why should I care? Even if another shade of blue is nearby, that doesn't make them comparable to me.

Because we're different. We're all different. That's why, even now, if I hear a flute player that's miles better than I am, or maybe even a step better than I am, I just ask God to give me the strength to find the gift I've been given, like they have. Or if someone gets a grade 10% higher than me, I'll still hit myself on the head mentally and tell myself to try harder, but not to beat them out.

Just, for my own self-fulfillment :p

OKAY, I have to go shine my flute before I go sleep, goodnight everyone!
:D yunho

HAPPY 2013!!!

Heehee we made it past 2012! :p

I stayed up till 12 again, last night, and the first thing we did was light blessed candles and pray the Rosary. When I was praying, I just stared at the flame of the candle and it felt kind of peaceful, I didn't need to think about anything else~ I think I'll take up meditation in the new year, it's very chilled out :p After praying, we, of course, ate a bunch of food :p

Noodle stir-fry, fruit salad, chocolate, cake, Pringles~
This is my "champagne", don't judge :p

But forget all that, I FINISHED MY 2012 SCRAPBOOK!!! It's WAY lengthier than it's supposed to be, but I only really worked on it in January, then for like...4 days in late December. I put way too much work into it, more than I think you're supposed to, buuuut that's okay, it turned out pretty~ I couldn't include screenshots of my relationship statuses, because Facebook Timeline doesn't let you see those, just all your pictures, statuses, and wallposts :( Nevertheless, I HAVE FINISHED IT, it's so gorgeous <3333 CLICK HERE!!

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Niel &lt;33

beautiful, lovely~ that's you, that's really you <3

Hey everyone!

Just wanted to non-flock this because it's not too earthshattering :p Well, it is, but not to the degree that I'd want to flock it XD 

Basically, I haven't been practicing flute. I've reduced myself to a level of mediocrity at which I have never been, where all the practice I do is in class. It's been going for like...2 months now, though I DID practice roughly two weeks ago. I have no idea how or why it happened, really, and it felt pretty bad :( I'd fail a run in class, or in Wind Ensemble, and think "Sheesh, I feel so mediocre even though I know I'm not..." but I was only around 1 or 2 steps higher than the people in my regular section. 

I've actually had quiiiite a few issues with band this year, which is weird because no one would've expected me to XD I was this close to quitting Wind Ensemble twice, skipped practice because I didn't feel like being there around twice, and meaninglessly blew my horn like, two thousand times, wondering why the heck I was even playing. It really wasn't that fun :( 
But once, my band teacher handed out this article by Allen Vizzutti, called Blow Your Horn From The Heart, which was basically saying that your body will align itself to accommodate the technical aspect of music if you just play from the heart, which made me feel better, because I'm the world's least technical person when it comes to anything, really XD  I once wrote in an essay last year, that I know what to do with a song to make you almost cry listening to it, but not how to sightread killer runs like everyone else can XD

And, being second chair really didn't help.  It felt like a new low for me, especially after being first for all these years X___X I remembered all the times when I would pray to God saying "God, I tried my best, I practiced every day, will you please grant me first chair?" and I really felt so betrayed when I learned that I didn't. But then I felt God ask me during a piece once, "Andrea, if I don't give you second chair, will you still love music? Will you still continue to practice and love flute the way you always did?" and I was like "God...I don't know..." but now, I don't know, I think I've finally figured out what I'm going to do XD

It wasn't all being second, really. There were a handful of disagreeable people that were making band in general hard for me, but I practiced for an hour today, without even timing myself or anything, and I dunno, it all came baaack to me, why I really liked playing flute, and just how nonmediocre I was, and blablablaaaaa it just felt really good XD So I have greatly resolved to not get lazy, and forget about racing for first chair, and forget about anyone bugging me, and just play. Because Riley said to me once, that music is a way to make and spread beauty, and it's all ruined when you're trying to beat someone, or trying not to let someone get to you, or just not practicing and not liking what you're doing.

So I will end off my lame-ass post by saying that if your technique sucks (like me!!!), or there are dickwads in your band, or anything like that, just remember what music is, how pretty it is, and how you only need to play music from your emooootions, man! Because music is just emotion, that's it. Skill and technique can only take you so far, if you've got no FEEEEL while you're playing, and if you've got the FEEEEL, your technique will follow.

Music is emoootion, baby!
Okay, I'm gonna go now, I'm getting lamer and lamer
Will post about all the drama lama tomorrow! flocked, of course :p 
Loooove <3 <3 <3 

Announcement Post!

Hello helloooo!

I hope everyone's week has been great! Mine has been interesting to say the least :p lolol 

One major change I'm making to my LJ is a pretty tiny friend cut. There are people on this that I'm kind of...not very comfortable with, and I figured that instead of locking all my posts to them or whatever, I'll just update my f-list! I'm also going to f-lock things a lot more often, because I found that it'll just work out better for me XD I mean, not every single post on this LJ is public, but 95% of them are, so I figured that maybe I should start locking more, just so I can speak more freely :p I just kept it more public because it's easier for me to send this url to my rl friends if I've got big stories and don't wanna retype it all out, but I'll figure out a new updating system, hah. It's just more of a privacy thing for me, because I get a handful of invisible guests per day, and I never really worried about them before, but now, let's just say that it's more of an issue with who these Invisible Guests could be :p 

Aside from that, to the people I cut, no hard feelings, k? :) Just chillax and live as exciting a life as you can :p 

Now that that's out of the way, I'll just post the crapload of stuff I have to post tomorrow or on Sunday, so look forward to that!